Great adventure yarn

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Message from: Mike <> :

Great adventure yarn, reminds me of Heinlein's
early work.  Your Roy from Green Hell series is
also great.

Minor point, in the last interlude at the end of
chapter 10 I think the protagonist is supposed be
Peter Baker as in the 2 earlier interludes, not
Wulf.
----------------

 

Definitely a story that I feel fits into the top

Re: The Adventures of a Greenie (GC IV) - Chapter 23 - [FineStories} Show Details FromFineStories Feedback   Tovanessaravencroft@yahoo.com  Message from:  <
------------------------------------------------
Definitely a story that I feel fits into the top
10% of the stories I've read in my 50 years of
reading. A very wide & well spread out universe
with well thought out polities. I was an Army
Paratrooper myself but many of my family were
Marines & a couple nephews are serving with them
presently. If any of todays militaries would still
be around in the far future I'd be astonished if
some future form of the USMC was not still in
existence. You created a quite believable young
protagonist in this story, one to pull in the
sympathy of the reader. With the final discussion
of Qaroniel it fits together very well, even the
idea of a planetary intelligence naturally
occurring has been theorized to be possible but
this adds an interesting dimension to it.
With the way you ended this I hope that someday
you return to let us know of how things go with
young Roy.
Jake

---------------------------
Thank you Jake!!!

[ New Review ] for Galaxy at War

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Vanessa Ravencroft,

A new review has been posted to your story.

Story: Galaxy at War
Chapter: 8. The Brick

From: Aimless6 ( http://www.fictionpress.com/u/897417/ )
Reply URL: https://www.fictionpress.com/pm2/post.php?rwid=17815382
-------------------

Belle station was supposed to be destroyed, so having a plan B already in
place would be an unusual sign of lack in confidence by the Kermac.

But a few Kermac start to improvise and manage to overwhelm;

a Station Security Chief,
a PsiCorp Colonel with links to the Grey Cats and TSI,
a dozen Marines in combat gear,
a maximum security prison with psi suppressors,
there are no Cerberus bots guarding the prison,
and there is no active computronic to check access codes.

A bit much isn't it?

--------------------------------

VANESSA SAYS:

 

Yes I see your points and I am proud to say you sound exactly like a Union Citizen would sound hearing this...or what Stahl would say if he hears about it. Normally I don't do spoilers but since you asked I make an exception and let you look inside my twisted mind and "plan" for the Story. The Leedei are a very recent member, coming from a dwarf galaxy very much removed from the Milky Way. They developed a TL 9 society based on very advanced PSI tech. Machinery / Devices that run on Genetic engineered "Brains". Devices that "Supposedly" allow to pin point a single mind (over incredible distances, that detect psionic activities and able to interrupt them over similar distances. Neither the Union, The Saresii nor the Kermac have anything comparable (not even the Saresii of the First Age of Knowledge) the Leedei are very protective of that tech and don't share it. No outsider has ever seen the Telelistener (only heard about it) these devices are the holy grail for: The Kermac, NAVINT, and Grey Cats and yes most of all for Cherubim of the TSI.

The twist of the story is ....Cherubim is using the captured Kermac, the story of Roy’s parents being alive (The dreams Roy has are implanted and triggered if needed) Cara, the Commander are NAVINT operatives. She wants the secret of these machines...and in case anything goes wrong TSI/ Cherubim has the Kermac as scape goats. Who looks further than the Kermac if something goes wrong?

The Leedei School Teacher has a heart for sob stories...They decide to use Roy. Because the Leedei are telepathic, they needed someone who has a story he believes in. What is more convenient than a "naive" Greenie who really thinks his parents sending him dream messages? Who believed the story of the old Bellebee.

If you read my stories you know that Captain Coldblood left in a hurry thinking the Explorer was destroyed. He “failed” his mission to collect the scientists. So why does the Bellebee think it was Captain Coldblood?

The Bellebee are blind, have no ears and remember details..Lies are unknown to a species that shares “one memory” But all you have to do is feed the right bits of information to a “blind Computer” and it will come to the conclusions the Bellebee made.

Bottom Line of the Story is: Cherubim (Who is for Earth first …not the Union) wants that technology for the TSI . For her to manipulate / find persons with a remote machine is a wet dream…but she can’t openly operate against a Union Member. So she needs a Scape goat… or several in this case.

What else I have planned shall remain a secret for now, but I assure you I have not written that chapter without a plan.

What makes me very proud is the way you asked those questions…It shows you have really read my stories and you took the time to tell me.

Thank you

Galaxies at War

Galaxies at War

due to really overwhelming demands to continue Roy Masters Story. I started posting chapters for Galaxies at War. (So much for my writing plans..they are still in effect but frankly my Readers wishes became quite important to me.

That this is indeed the case shows the enormous response to the first Galaxy at War chapters. It is by far the most read and reviewed story I have posted so far. In terms of reviews, emails, PM's, Hits and visits. (in relationship to the time it is up)

So I will post and complete the Galaxy at War Story first , before I resume the rewrite and post new chapters to the other stories.

To the Stars

Vanessa Ravencroft

A fan from ZANSIBAR!

[ New Review ] for Galaxy at War

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Vanessa Ravencroft,

A new review has been posted to your story.

Story: Galaxy at War
Chapter: 4. Hidden Package

From: GREAT STORY (Guest)
-------------------

GREAT STORY:Vanessa,
I am a reader from Zanzibar and I can proudly say that you are one of my
favourite authors!

I always keep checking on what new you have posted... Just like an addict who
can't get enough of the fix!

Keep up the good work, looking forward to more.

Cheers,
Mohamed

-------------------
Do not reply to this email.

FictionPress.com Messaging Service

Hi Carlos

January 20, 2013

Posted at 10:01 am

 

The language spoken in Chile is Spanish

The language spoken in Chile is Spanish, not
Portuges. Will be thankfull if you correct it


HI Carlos,

Muchas Gracias!
I will correct it in the upcoming Re-Write!

Thank you for pointing that out!

VR

Hello Terry Bond

Hi Terry

I have a Google Drive Account I share with my friends where you are welcome to edit and correct.
However I can not contact you as you send me this message as a "Guest" without chance to contact you.
Feel free to contact me via e mail : vanessaravencroft@yahoo.com

VR


Terry Bond 1/19/13 . chapter 4
Your stories are amazing! Thank you for sharing your talent with me. I have just spent most of my waking hours of the last two weeks reading your stories and enjoyed every minute. I seldom write to authors except to thank them but, I have to say you have become one of my top three favorites and top fiction writer. The only thing that bothered me at all with your writing, and this is me not your writing, is the spelling and small hiccups in the grammar. I went nuts with the use of of instead of off. lol As I say it is me and not your writing. Nothing holds my interest like your books except the way computer programming did back in the '70's and '80's (As long and I had a pack of Kools and a Mt. Dew I could never tell you what day it was.) I would like to go through your stories again and do some corrections if this would not offend you. I would use MS Word 2007 and if you don't like the results just hit the delete button. Really it's just an excuse for me to go back and reread the stories again. Thank You again for the many hours of pleasure you have given me.

To my Reader at Finestories.com

Just to let you know most threats on Fine Stories are posts of material published at Fictionpress and Stories Online. You might want to go there if you can't wait for updates...;-)

VR

Re: Eric Olafson, First Journeys (GC VI) - Chapter 5: Crystal Suite - [FineStories}
Show Details FromAnonymous   Tovanessaravencroft@yahoo.com  You are starting a lot of story threads.  I hope
you can keep track of them.  This promises to be
another excellent story from you.

Hi Jose

Thank you for reading and writing. I hope you find this Blog as it is the only way I can respond to anonymous and Guest Comments.

No worries - I update this Story at least twice a week.


From: FictionPress <bot@fictionpress.com>
To: vanessaravencroft@yahoo.com
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 10:47 PM
Subject: [ New Review ] for Galaxy at War

Vanessa Ravencroft,
A new review has been posted to your story.
Story: Galaxy at War
Chapter: 3. Salvage
From: Jose (Guest)
-------------------
Jose:Great start to book II, only problem is the anticipation for the next
chapter.
So looking forward to Chapter 3.
-------------------
Do not reply to this email.
FictionPress.com Messaging Service

[ New Story ] Sci-Fi: Galaxy at War, from Vanessa Ravencroft

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New Story from Vanessa Ravencroft,

Title: Galaxy at War

Category: Sci-Fi

Words: 184
Genre(s): General
Rating: Rated: T

Summary: Roy Masters, just turned sixteen, lost his parents to a Pirate
attack; the Kermac almost destroyed his home planet. He and his alien pet are
now on their way to Sares Prime. While he travels the the Galaxy prepares for
war.

http://www.fictionpress.com/s/3091395/1/

To Bill H.

To Bill H.

first of all let me thank you for reading my stories and express my gratitude for taking the time to write a comment

Every comment and reply from a reader, I treasure very much for comments like yours helped me to grow as a writer over the years and improve my skills.

But no comment I have received so far made me feel as proud as when I read yours.

While I would not dare to compare my writing with one of my all time favorite authors; if you see similarities of my stories to the writing of Robert A. Heinlein then I must be on the right track of becoming a real author.

It is your fault that I was unable to leave my writer's den today as I felt 10 feet tall and would not fit through the door...;-)

thank you very much!!!!

To the Stars

Truly yours

Vanessa Ravencroft

New Review for Eric Olafson Midshipman GC VIII

A new review has been posted to your story.

Story: Eric Olafson Midshipman GC VIII

Chapter: 19. CHAPTER 19 REAGAN TROPHY

From: Bill H.... (Guest)

-------------------

Bill Hobart:In the league of Robert A. Heinlein!

-------------------

Do not reply to this email.

FictionPress.com Messaging Service

To Benny - Story: NILFEHEIM

[ New Review ] for NILFEHEIM

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Vanessa Ravencroft,

A new review has been posted to your story.

Story: NILFEHEIM
Chapter: 8. Lunch

From: Guest
-------------------

:Sorry, I read and write for enjoyment. the originial story seemed to follow
eric's liffe growing up and following the traditions of his world. this story
just seems to try to explain why he wanted to leave his life as he knew it.
the character development seems to rely on the reader having red the other
version first. together this version is okay, but to me the originial version
is a better stand alone story and is broader in it's scope. Thanks for
opportunity to read both. Benny ()

-------------------
Hi Benny

 

I hope you find my Blog and read your answer; my reply to your message.
First of all thank you for reading and taking the time to write and letting me know what you think. No comment of you, my dear readers falls on deaf ears. No  suggestion without merit and no critique without helping me improve both my stories and my writing.
With that said, let me respond to your post: The Old story will not disappear, I will incorporate it and all its elements in the Rewrite, but there are plot holes, timing problems and other inconsistencies I need to fix before I move on to tell new stories.
Give it a chance and read the chapters to come and if you don't like it at all , the previous versions are all archived on my Wiki and can be read there.
With this I invite you to comment and participate  at any time you like.

Yours truly

Vanessa Ravencroft

The First Chapters of Nilfeheim are posted:
http://www.fictionpress.com/s/3087870/1/NILFEHEIM

NILFEHEIM

This is the begin of a compete rewrite of Eric Olafsons Saga.

It is intended to be the final content adding/ changing re-write and fix a series of Plot Holes, such as the Time lines of wars, Immortals, events that happened before. Explaining why Eric actually wants to be a Star Ship Captain, fixing the Longnight / Short Summer intervals . Changing some dates such as when Eric goes to the Academy and when he starts his Tigershark adventures...and finally when he becomes the Dark One. I am going to clean up the “Interludes” tighten this and that, fixing names ..make them consistent and while I am at it , there will be several reposting after my friends who offered to proof read after this but as I mentioned this is the last rewrite in terms of content.

The basic story is the same but I added stuff and the Eric Saga will expand a little in terms of volume,

So I keep the Old Versions up but after I completed the Rewrite they will be removed and posted under the “Old Story Versions “category of the GalNet Wiki.

So I hope you enjoy this new version.

I will furthermore change the Numbering scheme of the GC Universe Books. (Do away with I actually) But for those of my readers who are used to it it would be GC IV.

It is entitled : NILFEHEIM

It is the 51^st Century. Earth is now known as Terra and part of a Union of a gigantic Union of space faring civilizations. Many worlds are colonized. This is the story of Eric Olafson, a Neo Viking growing up on a harsh cold planet. With rigid rules, a cruel father and a Cosmic secret that manifests itself in Eric.